When estrangement hits us with our kids, for whatever reason, including addiction, it creates absence in a normal parent child relationship. NOTHING in life prepares us for this heartbreaking situation. Dick talks about some specific strategies that will help you as a parent to address this difficul
Judy Slegh learned how to treat her prodigal child so she could rediscover the jewel in him. She shares the life-changing process Holy Spirit led her through.
There is celebration, not condemnation, when a lost soul has come to its senses through repentance.
Are you battling the frustration, guilt and anger of parenting a prodigal child? Here's How to Survive As The Parent of Prodigal!
When my hopes and dreams and were crushed by grief and loss, there felt like nowhere else to turn but to the One who is over all things.
Continuing to pray boldly when circumstances are getting worse and worse is a struggle. I know. I have been there. …
Sometimes the storms we face are destructive. They leave scars that shape our future. They can push us to breaking point. Whether it's the storm of undiagnosed chronic illness wreaking havoc on your life, an unexpected divorce, a close friend suddenly turning on you, the loss of home through fire or flood, a prodigal child, or the death of a loved one, we all experience devastating storms. If you are in the middle of a storm, it seems all-encompassing. The grief and heartbreak overwhelm you. It threatens to swallow you. It may not seem possible, but there is hope to cling to in the middle of the storm. David encourages us in this as He cries out honestly to God: "Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, for in You my soul takes refuge; in the shadow of Your wings I will take refuge, till the storms of destruction pass by. I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me.” Psalm 57:1-2 As we think on these verses, let's consider: Where is the hope in the midst of destructive storms? Hope is found in our merciful God (v. 1). It is tempting to get angry at God or to doubt His goodness when everything is falling apart. I know I frequently want the storm to be over. In those desperate moments of despair, we must turn to God and seek His mercy. Don't turn away from Him in anger, but keep crying out to Him, as David does in this Psalm. Ask Him for mercy and for grace to persevere when the chronic pain is unbearable or the grief from loss overtakes you. Ask Him to give you hope. Hope is found in our Refuge in the storm (v. 1). The definition of refuge is “a condition of being safe or sheltered from pursuit, danger, or trouble.” We are safe in the storm, because we know the One who has complete control over the storm. The imagery here of finding refuge in the shadow of His wings is quite stunning. Just as a bird, caring for her young, protects them from harm of the winds and storms, so God does the same for us! He doesn't always cause the storm to cease, but He is our Rock and Refuge in it. So cry out to God, as David did, and find comfort and protection. Hope is found in realizing this is temporary (v. 1). As David mentions, the storms of destruction will pass by (v. 1). They are not eternal, even though it may feel that way! Our afflictions, if we are believers in Christ, are temporary (2 Cor. 4:17). This is perhaps one of the hardest truths to believe when you're suffering. It seems like it will never end! But we know that God is faithful and that His Word is true, and so we can rest in knowing this trial is temporary. Hope is found in remembering (v. 2). God is fulfilling His purpose for you. This is an interesting phrase to follow verse 1. After all, David is running from Saul. The man promised to be the next king of Israel is hiding for fear of his life! This doesn’t make sense. How could this be accomplishing God's purposes? I'm sure David didn't understand, as I usually don’t in the middle of my storms. But somehow, amidst the destruction, God is fulfilling His purpose for you. For me. He has not forgotten you. Remember that no matter how bad it gets, God is fulfilling His good plans for you. The truth is, knowing God doesn't take away the storms of life. But there is hope we can breathe even as we face the most heart-wrenching circumstances. Today, if you find yourself there, run to God and take refuge, till the storms of destruction pass by. And as you wait, let Him give you hope that can only be found in Him.
How can we best relate to our grown child who has completely rejected his Christian faith and upbringing? After graduating from high school he moved in with his girlfriend and became involved with drug and alcohol abuse. Our hearts ache to reach out to him, but we don't want to appear to be condoning his lifestyle. What would you recommend?
There are very few griefs for a parent greater than a child who turns away from the gospel faith they were raised in.
Prayer is powerful, and it is very important that we lay hold on that power when we pray for the prodigal child. God hears those prayers!
To all the grieving Mothers I know, you are near and dear to my heart. May you all feel peace during this time of year as we celebrate our Savior's birth, the One who gives us the hope and faith of mending our hearts and souls for eternity.
We have survived our first year. So much of a grief journey is individual. Mine has been eye opening. Today I want to share some of what I've learned.
Are you a parent of a prodigal child? Is your life consumed with grief or are you living a resurrected life in Jesus? Have you surrendered them to Him?
The trial of a prodigal child is a uniquely painful one for a woman. As we live in a day in which the enemy is coming after our children in an unprecedented way, we will increasingly find ourselves ministering to a mother whose child has turned their back on the Lord or is mired in darkness. Guilt, Isolation, Grief A woman with a prodigal child often reels with guilt and shame as she feels she has somehow failed her child, no matter how faithfully she raised him. The unspoken (though sometimes spoken) undercurrent of “it is your fault” often comes through the well-meaning advice of others. It flashes in technicolor as a mother looks from her struggling child to others who seem so perfect. While some brokenness seems acceptable in society or in the church, she may feel her situation is unacceptable. Because of this, she is often unwilling to share her situation or her prayer needs, resulting in isolation and vulnerability. She is confused by what is happening, her prayers feel unanswered, and she is afraid. She is desperately weary from the war that is raging in her home and feels helpless to stop what is happening to her family. (A prodigal greatly impacts the other children and the marriage.) In a very real sense, she is grieving. Dreams for her child may have been lost, a future altered, and the “happy family” she had long hoped and prayed for may have been radically changed. She is faced with a reality that she never believed would be hers. How can we most effectively and lovingly hold up her arms in this battle? Be an Available Safe Place First of all, be an available, safe place where she can be heard without shock and without judgment. She needs to be loved, affirmed, and prayed with and for in a grace-filled place where she is unafraid to be real. Sometimes she just needs someone to quietly hold her and cry with her. Be aware that there may be a real need for a professional counselor’s intervention. Ask the Lord for wisdom in directing her in that way even as you walk beside her. Feed Her God’s Sure Promises As with every trial, her greatest need is to be consistently reminded of the unchanging character of God (Heb. 13:8) and of His sure and unfailing promises. The Lord is asking her to trust Him with what is most precious to her in a place that can feel so very dark and out of control. She needs reminding that He remains sovereign and wise regardless of the choices her child is making. When the “Why?” questions pound her, she needs assurance that God’s ways, though so different from ours, are grounded in infinite mercy and love. When she strains to believe that the cries of her heart are being heard, take her back again and again to the truth of who He is, to His heart, and feed her with the only promises that she can count on as certain. As much as we want to say the right thing to give her courage and hope, only God’s assurances can hold her when she feels almost overwhelmed by the trial (Isa. 43:1–3) or feels too weak to go on fighting (2 Cor. 12:9). Help her continually lift her eyes off of the heartache in front of her and back onto Jesus. Battle with God’s Divine Weapons Though this battle is the Lord’s, He has called this precious mother to fight for her child. The key is to use the weapons He intends. In her desperation, she can easily find herself resorting to the weapons of the world that arise from our flesh . . . anger, accusations, and manipulation. These tactics are hard to resist when your own heart is being wounded and fear grips you, but they prove faulty to open this child’s eyes and turn him from darkness to light (Acts 26:18). Only God’s divine weapons—the Word of God and prayer—will pierce a hard heart, tear down strongholds, and always accomplish God’s purpose (Heb. 4:12; 2 Cor. 10:4–5; Isa. 55:11). Without question, praying God’s Word for her child, claiming it for him day after day, is the single most powerful and effective thing that she can do (James 5:16). She also needs to be reminded often that her battle is not with flesh and blood (Eph. 6:12). This war is not with her child. It is with the enemy of his or her soul. It is vital that she fight the real enemy, who would love to destroy the relationship between this precious mother and her child. Exhort her to do all that she can to keep that relationship intact, even if it is only held by the strong thread that is a mother’s love. Remind Her of the Power of a Mother’s Love Encourage her to forgive and love fiercely, purposefully, and unconditionally (1 Cor. 13). A mother’s love will tear down walls the enemy wants to erect and will keep the way open for healing. Her child desperately needs her presence in his life even if he loudly proclaims that he does not. Help her to keep her arms open wide for her prodigal’s return, whenever that might be (Luke 15). A mother of a prodigal needs your support to do three things that are vital, but not easy: 3 Vital Steps 1. Release her grip and yield her child to God’s hand She will likely struggle greatly with laying down her fix and rescue instincts, which often get in the way of God’s work and purposes. Yielding control and allowing difficult consequences that tear at her heart requires confidently desiring God’s will—whatever that entails—and great faith (Prov. 3:5–6, Jer. 29:11). She must begin learning to trust His love and His plan for her child more than her own (2 Tim. 1:12). 2. Wait in faith (Ps. 27:14; 130:5; Heb. 11:1) This trial is rarely a short storm, and things could very likely get worse before they get better. It is an easy place for discouragement to grow and trust to waver. Help her look for and celebrate the places that she can see God’s hand at work, however big or small. This will strengthen a mom as she waits (2 Peter 3:8–9). Believe with her and for her. It is often in the darkness that God does His greatest work (Ex. 14:21). 3. Hold fast to hope and don’t give up (Rom. 12:12) Take her weary heart again and again to the power of the cross. There is no darkness that the light of Christ cannot pierce and no heart that is beyond His reach. No matter what she sees, she must continue to pray without ceasing, clinging to the absolute truths that God always completes what He has begun (Phil.1:6) and has the power to do all that He has promised (Rom. 4:20). Finally, encourage her to receive God’s grace for herself (Heb. 4:16). Help her to wash in His unconditional love, in the forgiveness He offers for every place that she feels failure, and in the realization that her weakness is the opening through which He can pour His strength and faithfulness. From the beginning of this journey to the end, His grace will be enough for a woman who trusts God with her prodigal child (2 Cor. 12:9).
There are behaviors I've picked up as a bereaved mother. Some seem pretty crazy. I'd like to think I'm not alone. Here are 11 of the craziest.
Has your heart ever hurt so much you didn’t want to eat or couldn’t sleep? Grief over a lost loved one or prodigal child, unmet expectations, rejection, and betrayal can cause us to feel that…
Mama, does your heart ache for an adult child who has wandered off and chosen not to follow the Lord? I am offering words of hope today, not as an empathetic mom, but from one who was the source of such grief for many years. How I deeply regret the choices that caused my parents to fear, to hurt an
Becoming a mother, whether physical or spiritual, is a life-changing experience. Joy and hopefulness fill our hearts as we anticipate nurturing the child. Regrettably, the nurturing may terminate prematurely either by the death or the choice of the child. Kelsey will tenderly discuss the grief gener
Reblogged on WordPress.com
For many parents right now watching their kids slowly transition away from the church, it can be all too common to experience feelings of confusion, fear and a lingering sense of failure.
How do you love in pain, grief, rebellion with prodigals in your life that don't feel loved by Christians. Probably family members-spouses, kids, siblings
Who would enter marriage intending to get a divorce? A large number of people in my church have been hurt deeply by divorce. As common as divorce is, I'm convinced that most of them could be avoided.
How do you love in pain, grief, rebellion with prodigals in your life that don't feel loved by Christians. Probably family members-spouses, kids, siblings
Top Nashville lifestyle blog, Nashville Wifestyles, features some helpful tips on How To Cope With Grief. Click now for all the details!
When you love a prodigal, your heart hurts around the clock. Yet I've found hope and comfort by clinging to God in those hard times.
We are blessed to have access to so many excellent books on parenting. From conception to empty nesting, from strong-willed toddlers to rebellious prodigals, from the joy of welcoming a child to th…
Dads, use this helpful list as a springboard for spending quality time with your sons.
Ninety miles an hour-that’s how fast my mind can go from here to there. From what’s in front of me to what’s behind me. From laughter to swallowing sobs. We sit in a living…
Find scriptures to pray over a prodigal child. Praying alongside other mothers brings hope as together you lift your cares up to the Lord.
This post was originally published on Still Standing by Malka Ahmed Grieving the loss of a child is a grief that is unique. It is a loss that is still largely considered taboo. When someone experiences
