We’ve had a good run, internet—but we’ve got to break up. It’s not you. It’s me. I know it seems like I’m totally in love with you given the amount of time we spend together, but it’s become painfully clear to me I am not happy when I’m with you. Yes, you have your good and wonderful qualities. Online shopping makes my life easier. Online bill pay. Email. Amazon Prime. I really do love all the convenience. But I’m so over feeling like an epic failure at life. We just can’t seem to get on the same page. (Ha, get it?...