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Weeping in despair, grief. Confusion. A shattered life. Depression and self doubt. Isolation. This heap of feelings and thoughts and questions are the beginning of restoration. We can heal even the PTSD after a sociopath or what many call a narcissist. It includes emotions rolling over us in grand sweeps and simmering cess pools. These […]
Here is my story of how gratitude lifted me out of the pit of despair and depression after a life-altering loss.
Mental wellness and painful emotions go hand in hand with your overall well-being. What comes to mind when you hear the word, “emotions?
You’ve been in shock, you’ve denied, you’ve gotten angry, bargained for your loved one’s life – and nothing has worked. They are gone, and your new reality is starting to sink in - heavily. This is the depression stage of grief, and for many people it’s the hardest and
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Sobriety in grief may be the hardest thing to manage. There has been a debate about the stages of grief among experts. Some experts say there are no stages of grief and that people have different reactions and different times and ways of healing. Grief can be overpowering and paralyzing, putting some people into a black hole of despair and loneliness that lasts and lasts. But others find ways to move through crushing grief and carry on in remarkable ways. Author Maribeth Ditmar tells how she stayed sober despite problems with addiction among family members and the loss of two children.
The Appalachian Regional Commission released a report about how diseases of despair spiked in rural Appalachia during the Covid-19 pandemic.
I doubt anyone has ever mentioned that you appear extremely joyful or that you grin excessively. Why is it that whenever we feel negative emotions like grief, despair, or depression, we are often expected to overcome them within a certain timeframe? In our modern society, it is also considered unacceptable to openly share feelings of loneliness, sadness, fear, or general unhappiness. My brother died at the tender age of 12 and left such a void in our lives that my entire family grieved his loss for decades. Fortunately, we were raised to accept this as a perfectly normal and natural process for us. We all understood that we would work through our feelings of grief and loss in our own way and at our own pace. We did not grieve according to a schedule or set of societal rules. A helpful approach to understanding and dealing with emotions is to compare them to how our body processes food. Similar to the way we break down, digest, and absorb nutrients from food, we also need to process our emotions to extract the valuable lessons and insights they offer for personal growth. And just as no one needs to tell your body what to do or how to digest the food you eat, there is no need for anyone to tell you how to process your emotions. We all have our own innate process that is perfect for each of us as an individual and serves us in a perfect, natural order. But when an outside influence or source tries to interfere, even with the best of intentions, things often start to go wrong. Apologies should never be made for expressing emotions. By doing so, you are essentially apologizing for being honest and genuine. The emotions that we are advised to repress need an outlet. Ignoring them doesn't make them disappear entirely. Instead, they are stored in our unconscious mind and in our cellular memory. If we don't address and release them in a healthy manner, they will grow and become harmful to our mental and physical well-being until they find a resolution. When we entered into this realm, into this specific version of reality, we were given the gift of having and controlling our thoughts and emotions in any situation. When did it become a disadvantage to openly express negative feelings? How did these emotions acquire their labels of positive or negative? Who made the decision for us that it was acceptable to experience joy, but not acceptable to feel sadness? Our ancestors were lucky. They were privileged when it came to expressing their true feelings because they had communal practices and rituals that provided socially accepted ways of expressing and processing emotions such as grief, anger, and sadness. These practices played a critical role in the social fabric and psychological well-being of the tribe or community. In traditional societies, community gatherings and rituals were integral to the processing of emotions. When someone experienced loss or hardship, the community would come together to share in the grief. Rituals and ceremonies provided a framework for collectively expressing these emotions, strengthening social bonds and providing a sense of belonging and support. Numerous societies had distinct traditions and practices to handle grief and challenging emotions. These practices typically encompassed mourning periods, specific rituals, and activities intended to honor the departed or recognize personal hardships. These endeavors were not solitary in nature, but rather communal events that fostered a supportive atmosphere for individuals to navigate their emotional struggles. Living in close-knit communities also allowed for more immediate and ongoing support. There was less stigma attached to expressing vulnerability or sadness because these emotions were understood and respected as universal human experiences. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Modern society highly values positivity and productivity, making it challenging for individuals to openly acknowledge and handle their negative emotions in a beneficial manner. Society imposes significant pressure on individuals to constantly showcase happiness, energy, and accomplishments, while disregarding or minimizing feelings of sadness, hopelessness, or apprehension. Exhibiting negative emotions is often perceived as a display of vulnerability or inadequacy. Today, we must deal with our feelings in private, rather than in social and public settings. This isolation then contributes further to the negative emotions we experience and makes it more difficult to seek or receive support. There is also still a great deal of stigma surrounding mental health issues, even in the most progressive circles and nations, which further discourages people who are suffering from seeking help or openly sharing their struggles. I encourage you to personally explore and interpret your emotions, giving yourself the necessary time to process and release them in a way that feels right to you. It's important not to let others dictate how you should feel or impose time limits on your healing process. No one should tell you to quickly recover or move on from something that deeply affects you. The healthier we grow when we behave in a manner that aligns with our inherent nature. Feel free to consistently own and reveal your genuine emotions. About The Author: KittyKitty is a Canadian Intuitive, born into a large family of clairvoyants and clairaudients. A local celebrity, she's been giving accurate predictions in her paper for over fifteen years now, and is often called upon to lead séances and provide readings at Psychic Fairs in Vancouver. A trained counselor, she combines her natural Gifts to detect blockages at their root, and provide detailed psychic information and practical advice for success and happiness. She's helped locate missing items and people, has communicated messages from loved ones who've passed on, and communicates with two Sacred Celestial Beings who are unerring in the startling information they provide. If you'd like to connect with this remarkable Intuitive, whose talent spans generations, you can find Kitty at PsychicAccess.com. The significance of accepting and conveying our genuine emotions In a world that often encourages us to hide or suppress our true feelings, it is more important than ever to embrace and express our authentic emotions. Many of us have been taught to believe that showing vulnerability or strong emotions indicates weakness, but the reality is that embracing and expressing our genuine emotions is vital for our mental, emotional, and even physical well-being. Authentic emotions are the real feelings that arise within us in response to various situations or experiences. They can range from happiness and excitement to sadness, anger, or fear. These emotions are a fundamental part of our individuality, and ignoring or repressing them can have harmful effects on our overall health. One of the main reasons why embracing and expressing authentic emotions is important is that it allows us to form genuine and meaningful connections with others. When we are open and honest about how we feel, we create an atmosphere of trust and authenticity. This openness not only helps us develop deeper connections with loved ones but also enables us to attract like-minded individuals who appreciate and accept us for who we truly are. Furthermore, embracing and expressing authentic emotions is essential for our mental and emotional well-being. When we suppress or deny our feelings, they tend to accumulate inside us, leading to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression. By allowing ourselves to experience and express our emotions, we release the pent-up energy associated with them, which can provide a sense of relief and emotional balance. Moreover, embracing and expressing authentic emotions can help us gain a better understanding of ourselves. Our emotions serve as valuable signals that provide insight into our needs, desires, and values. By paying attention to these emotions and allowing ourselves to fully experience them, we can gain a deeper understanding of who we are and what truly matters to us. This self-awareness can guide us in making decisions that align with our authentic selves and lead to greater fulfillment and happiness. Additionally, embracing and expressing authentic emotions can contribute to our physical well-being. Research has shown that suppressing emotions can have negative effects on our physical health, including increased blood pressure, weakened immune system, and higher risk of chronic illnesses. On the other hand, allowing ourselves to experience and express our emotions in a healthy way can help reduce stress levels, boost our immune system, and promote overall well-being. It is important to note that embracing and expressing authentic emotions does not mean acting impulsively or without considering others. It is about finding healthy ways to acknowledge, process, and communicate our feelings. This can involve journaling, talking to a trusted friend or therapist, engaging in creative outlets such as art or music, or practicing mindfulness and self-reflection. In conclusion, embracing and expressing our authentic emotions is crucial for our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. By allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and honest about how we feel, we create deeper connections with others, gain self-awareness, and promote overall health and happiness. Therefore, let us embrace our authentic emotions and let them guide us towards a more fulfilling and genuine life. Continue reading →
Grief is something I can count on as sure as I can count on the darkness setting in each night. As a counselor, grief is attached to many of the circumstances that bring people into my office. Whether it’s the grief of an unexpected loss, the sorrow of a broken marriage, or the sadness of a desire unfulfilled.
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God loves us so much, He puts limits on the degree to which the enemy and depression can interfere with our lives. Read more for ways God limits the impact of depression.
An essential grief guide and recovery workbook for those who have said, "I thought I'd feel better by now." Grief does not follow a timeline or a set path. It is nonlinear and messy, doubling back on itself just when you thought you were out of the woods. Those who have experienced the loss of a loved one know this unequivocally, but Western society still seems to think that grief should only last six months to a year-tops-when in fact, grief can last throughout a person's entire life and manifest as serious mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, anger, and despair. The Long Grief Journey, co-written by a psychotherapist and a clinical psychologist who have both worked with grieving individuals for decades, is for the people who are past the acute pain and effects of a sudden loss and are now learning to live beyond that. It is for those who by all appearances seem to have "moved on." They're working, carrying out their responsibilities, showing up for important life events, yet they quietly bear the weight of their sadness and longing for their loved one. There's a name for this type of long-term, unresolved grief. In fact, there are several: complicated grief, traumatic grief, complex bereavement, prolonged grief, extended grief, abnormal grief, exaggerated grief, and pervasive grief disorder. If you feel "stuck" after experiencing the death of a loved one, even if much time has passed, this book is for you. With exercises, journal prompts, and rituals that will further help readers along their grief path, The Long Grief Journey is designed to educate, support, and coach you to rekindle a desire to live life fully, all while still cherishing and embracing the memories of your loved one.
This morning I was checking my blog stats, which allows me to see how new readers are finding me, and what Google searches are leading people to my website. Normally it’s about the same… Husband works too much Makeup for broken out skin How to pray for relationship with daughter But today was different. Among […]
Too often, the experience of guilt is actually a part of one's own Grief Process. To makes sense of this devastating experience in which our loved one is taken from our lives, we look to blame what or who we can. Sometimes, in our pain, we blame others for contributing to our loss. For those, it is easier to look outward, rather than within. But for those self-punishing ones who tend to internalize their blame, first and foremost, what stands out in one's mind are the blatantly apparent thoughts of where they may have fallen short. Often, they are haunted by the thoughts of what they did or didn't do while their loved one was still alive. This type of self-flagellation often serves as their own private hell.
Chronic pain is a complex issue it is invisible, and no two patients are alike. This can make it difficult to approach them. Here's how to help.
Depression can affect more than one aspect of your life. In this blog, read how to deal with depression at work while trying to stay productive. Special tips for WFH
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Chronic pain is a complex issue it is invisible, and no two patients are alike. This can make it difficult to approach them. Here's how to help.
When considering how we handle the emotional ups and downs of life it helps if we realise the value of affording the same respect and care to our emotional selves as we do to looking after our physical body. Homoeopathy … Continued
The average human being in the developed world battles sadness, anger, stress, depression and worry on a daily basis. While the majority of the world's population confront extreme poverty, famine, conflict and despair those of us privileged to lead relatively easy lives must tackle fear, stress, and anxiety. Why are those of us blessed with riches beyond compare immersed in loneliness and desperation? We are living in a time of confusion, we try as we might, yet gathering material possessions can do nothing to mend broken hearts, and shattered souls. Now, more than at any other time in human kind's history, stress, anxiety, and psychological problems are taking a tremendous toll on the human condition. Religious beliefs should afford a sense of comfort however; it seems that 21st century man has lost the ability to connect to God. Pondering the meaning of life no longer overcomes a feeling of abandonment. This desire to acquire material possessions, which in some way validates our reason for being, has become the balm that soothes our troubled souls. Why is this so? We have the best of everything readily available, yet the reality is we have nothing. Nothing that comforts the soul. Beautiful furnishings do not hold our hand in the darkest night. The latest entertainment centre does not wipe our tears or soothe our furrowed brow. Those of us living with pain and grief, or afflicted with hardship feel abandoned. We feel rudderless on an open sea. Huge waves threaten to engulf us at any given moment. Our desires and debts stand at the apex and loom over us, like great avenging angels, and we search for comfort in addictions and self-destructive behaviour. How do we step away from the precipice? In Islam, the answer is remarkably simple. We turn back to our Creator. God knows what is best for His creation. He has complete knowledge of the human psyche. He knows of the pain, the despair, and the sadness. God is whom we are reaching for in the darkness.
How do you grieve? How do you find hope after losing a loved one to suicide? As a mental health professional, suicide is a topic we don't talk about enough.
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My psychologist tasked me with writing a diary entry, “Grieving the Life That I Will Never Have”, as a person with chronic illness and pain.
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